[ Akane is doing a better job of steeling herself, now. At least, expression-wise.
Her feelings are dulling, evening out, but it seems more through the effort of holding them back than them actually calming down. ]
There's no insight I can give you. I shouldn't have to explain why a place like this is scary.
[ Because people are dying all the time would be the logical conclusion. It's not necessarily the truth behind Akane's fears and frustrations, but she's fine leading Milla to that, instead. ]
[Anyone would be. Except Akane, who marched straight to a killer, and had a conversation with him. Akane, who implied that she was on his side nonetheless. Akane, who didn't so much as twitch a muscle at the implication of Shirasu "picking" Akane as his new partner instead—and whose death that would result in.
But never fear.
Not even once.
Milla has never once attempted to hide her emotions—and the doubt writ large is no exception. Still, there is the worry, a constant head-shaking concern in the background.]
And you are upset.
[But somehow, it wasn't about what was happening here.]
[ Akane just stares at Milla evenly, not adding any more.
There's no use trying to justify her feelings. And isn't that a reason for hopelessness in itself? What good would it do to try and defend herself? Who's mind could she change with words? ]
[ Behind her walls, there's a burst of irritation and disbelief.
Without judgment? That's impossible. No one can be like that. Akane is too caught up in her emotional reactions to thing--and her awareness of those reactions, so she doesn't even think to reply verbally. ]
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2019-07-03 05:31 am (UTC)[Her tone is soft, almost quiet.]
But perhaps we can speak about it. Together, it may seem a little less frightening.
no subject
Date: 2019-07-03 05:37 am (UTC)[ She doesn't want Milla to feel it, but that's not going to happen, is it? ]
no subject
Date: 2019-07-03 05:40 am (UTC)I will not force you, Akane. But I am aware of it, now—and I will not forget it, even if it passes.
Will you at least give me some insight as to why?
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Date: 2019-07-03 05:43 am (UTC)Her feelings are dulling, evening out, but it seems more through the effort of holding them back than them actually calming down. ]
There's no insight I can give you. I shouldn't have to explain why a place like this is scary.
[ Because people are dying all the time would be the logical conclusion. It's not necessarily the truth behind Akane's fears and frustrations, but she's fine leading Milla to that, instead. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-07-03 06:04 am (UTC)The repression is actively worse, and palpable. The worry, concern, flows like water sloshing out of a bucket, tap still on.]
That's...
[Not what this is. Definitely not. Where was the fear when she spoke to Shirasu? Why was there rage instead when he struck during the trial?
But that's all Akane wants it to be between them.]
I see.
no subject
Date: 2019-07-03 10:45 pm (UTC)Everyone is getting killed. It's scary. It's infuriating. Anyone would be upset.
no subject
Date: 2019-07-04 11:26 am (UTC)[Anyone would be. Except Akane, who marched straight to a killer, and had a conversation with him. Akane, who implied that she was on his side nonetheless. Akane, who didn't so much as twitch a muscle at the implication of Shirasu "picking" Akane as his new partner instead—and whose death that would result in.
But never fear.
Not even once.
Milla has never once attempted to hide her emotions—and the doubt writ large is no exception. Still, there is the worry, a constant head-shaking concern in the background.]
And you are upset.
[But somehow, it wasn't about what was happening here.]
no subject
Date: 2019-07-05 06:16 am (UTC)There's no use trying to justify her feelings. And isn't that a reason for hopelessness in itself? What good would it do to try and defend herself? Who's mind could she change with words? ]
no subject
Date: 2019-07-08 04:12 am (UTC)In your own time.
[If ever. But there was little point to pushing, for the moment.
Reopening her eyes, she nods, and shifts her weight.]
And I will hear you whenever you need me to, without judgement.
no subject
Date: 2019-07-08 11:02 pm (UTC)Without judgment? That's impossible. No one can be like that. Akane is too caught up in her emotional reactions to thing--and her awareness of those reactions, so she doesn't even think to reply verbally. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-07-09 02:40 am (UTC)She exhales, and shakes her head.]
You don't have to believe me, Akane.
But I will stay by your side regardless.
no subject
Date: 2019-07-09 02:47 am (UTC)Just because this messed up world made me your partner?
no subject
Date: 2019-07-09 03:15 am (UTC)But why shouldn't I value your existence as a living person here, regardless of that?
no subject
Date: 2019-07-09 03:24 am (UTC)[ Uhh, wait, what is she even arguing, here? Akane???? ]
no subject
Date: 2019-07-09 10:19 am (UTC)Why should I?
[She repeats the question back.]
Are you arguing against your own worth?
no subject
Date: 2019-07-09 05:06 pm (UTC)No, but... I'm not in control, here. I can't just change your settings to make you like me.
[ So why does anyone...? ]
no subject
Date: 2019-07-10 01:27 pm (UTC)...]
No. You can't.
But perhaps consider the following: even without manipulation, I will work to protect you, as I told you from the start.
no subject
Date: 2019-07-10 10:42 pm (UTC)[ Which she. Does not even remotely believe. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-07-11 11:15 am (UTC)You are free to believe what you like, Akane.
In the end, I will speak through my actions alone.